i don't believe that anybody feels the way i do about you

today was a momentous day!!! it was the first day where i have downloaded music after hearing it on The O.C.!!!! i know - BIG DAY.

so, The O.C. was always famous for having really great music from less known artists blah blah whatever whatever.

in the Valentine's Day episode (which i LOVED) there was a really great cover of 'Wonderwall' by Oasis. and so i looked it up, and it was by RYAN ADAMS!!! who knew he did a cover of Wonderwall!? i didn't know.

so, i ended up downloaded that, AS WELL as a GREAT live version of the song sung by Noel Gallagher. i really love it.

AND THEN!

i was just watched another episode and said, "omg i have to download this song too!!" so, after some "o.c. music research," discovered that the song is 'Something Pretty' by Patrick Park.

another great song! and it played during the part where Seth interrupts the kissing booth to proclaim his love for Summer. AWWWW. omg Seth. i need him. i love him so much. i need a Seth Cohen please.

i'm really loving The O.C. a lot. probably a lot more than i really should be. i had no idea it was so hilarious! all the scenes in the Cohen household crack me up. Seth and his parents are great comedy.

oh, here's the two new songs i got:

'SOMETHING PRETTY' by Patrick Park
'WONDERWALL' by Ryan Adams

check it out!

hm. that's pretty much all i did today. watch The O.C. oh, i went to the grocery store.

my horoscope for today kind of freaked me out....

The devil and the deep blue sea -- take your pick. Under most unusual circumstances, you may bump into someone today who seems to be a representative from both. Within days, oddly enough, they'll manage to find a place in your heart. Be ready. Be ready for their company, and be ready to feel the need to make a decision quickly. Good luck, no matter what you choose.

weird, right? i don't know. it gave me a very uneasy feeling when i read it. "the devil and the deep blue sea?" what does that mean!? it sounds like a Rolling Stones lyric. is it?

speaking of The Rolling Stones, i decided that most JET songs remind me of Rolling Stones songs. but, i can't figure out which ones. like, which Rolling Stones songs they sound like. JET definitely has a retro-throwback feel to them, i think. i think.

oh, i was also productive today in learning more about Crash Kings. i kept thinking about how one week ago Ryan and i were IN NEW JERSEY making awesome friends and seeing an awesome concert.

so, naturally, i went on Twitter and read through every single one of the Crash Kings tweets. it took a while. at first, i was not proud to be doing this. but then, it just became awesome. and i learned a lot about them.

i learned that Mike's birthday is 2 april. and Tony's birthday is 27 september. i had this feeling that Tony was a march baby. so, i was wrong about that. ah well.

and i found some really great pictures. they posted a picture from the time they went to a Jonas Brothers concert which made ME REALLY HAPPY. and i kind of can't believe that they went to a Jonas Brothers concert.

they also posted this picture of the three of them standing on a pier in front of the ocean. the picture is now currently my desktop background. "why?" you may ask. well, let me tell you.

Mike. is. wearing. a. cardigan.


REASONS WHY THAT PICTURE IS MY DESKTOP BACKGROUND:

1. Mike is wearing a cardigan


oh man. i can't look at the picture for very long because i start to lose my breath. for serious. it takes the wind right out of me. and then i get goosebumps.

MIKEWEARINGACARDIGAN.


shall we? we shall.

(prepare yourself... looking directly at this picture may cause burn damage to your eyes because IT IS SO HOTTTTTTT.)




oh wow. yep. there it is. BOY WEARING CARDIGAN. yeah. yep.

we all know how i feel about boys wearing cardigans. YEAH. they take my breath away and give me goosebumps.

WHOA. okay, we need to move on.


i also found this ridiculously adorable picture of Tony and Mike at a Dodger's game last summer. yeah. i really hope that picture is hanging in their parents living room.

and in THAT picture - Tony is wearing his glasses.

but, we can't get into that. or else i might go into some kind of sexy love shock.

SEXY LOVE SHOCK. that's what they need to call their next record. i'll have to remember that for when they are making their next record. i'll tweet it to them.

SON OF A GUN those boys are pretty.


okay. it's 3:14am. i need to be up again in 45 minutes. so, perhaps i will get some sleep before then. MAN, that daylight savings crap really jumped up on me. that sucked. i didn't think i would be that affected. but YEAH.

i was SO TIRED all morning. i have no idea what time i went to bed. but then i had to answer the phone at 7:15am, which was really 8:15am and i could barely talk to the person because i was soooo tired. i think i managed to do the entire thing with my eyes closed.

and then i had to go downstairs to let the day staff in at 8 am (really 9am) and again - i could barely keep my eyes open for 15 minutes. it was crazy. and then i slept until like 1pm. i think. i have no idea. maybe it was either noon or 2pm. i don't know. no, i don't think it was 2pm. i think it was 1pm.

ALSO - i set my phone alarm for 4:05am sunday morning. and i woke up at 5:45am and the alarm was going off - but there was no sound. LAME! i have no idea why the alarm on that phone sucks so much.

and then again, i had set it for 7:50am, and it just never went off at all. it just shuts itself off. it's so weird.

but! i made two new ringtones today online.

1. It's Only Wednesday
2. Skin and Bones

i'm currently using It's Only Wednesday. although it's going to be bad because someone called me today and i just totally didn't care about anything except singing along. the phone was in the other room and i didn't even get up to see who it was. i just rocked.

anyways. now it's 3:20am. i should get into bed for 40 minutes. should i? yeah, i should.

it's been raining all day. and it got really windy! i like it. although, the windows in my bedroom shake sooooo bad. it scared Ruby Tuesday multiple times last night.

i like the rain. except not when it creates mud. mud is gross. and we have a dirt driveway.

ok. now i'm really going to go to bed. 3:23am.

i still have to tell you about my car. i haven't done that yet. i'll post a picture. and i still have to post a picture of my old car reaching 100,000 miles. notice how i said, "my old car?" does that mean i got a new car?!?! maybe! maybe!! i won't give anything away.

tomorrow is sunday? or monday? i think it's sunday. no it's not - it's monday. because today was sunday because i had to get up to let in the day staff.

MONDAY! have a great monday. have a great beginning of the week. i have no plans! what a surprise!!!

ok. 3:27am. goodnight!!!!! good day!!!!! good everything!!!!!!

hey - know what's good? that picture of Mike wearing the cardigan. let's look at it again and have sweet dreams, shall we? yes. great idea, julie.


WOW. yep. i'm having good dreams already. and i'm still awake.

ok. this is getting out of my control. END. END IT JULIE.

ok!!!!! have a great day!!!! i'll write more later and try not to go crazy.


take care. be well.


<3!!!!!!

hey kids!

i woke up this morning (saturday morning, which it took me a long time to figure out) and immediately had a song stuck in my head.

i could think of the tune and two words, "hey kids" and then it went da dada dadadada. and i kept thinking, "what is this song? how do i know it?" and i kept singing it to myself. and then slowly, i could start to picture the band singing it. and then realized -

it was a JET song!!!

and then i could visualize Nic wearing that plaid shirt he never takes off, and singing the song. and then i needed to download it immediately. and now i love it! i've been listening to it all day!

what a great song!

that was an exciting way to start off the day.

and then it got even more exciting.

1. i got 2 discs of The O.C. in my mailbox at the post office!!!

2. i started watching an episode and the kids are all sitting around hanging out. and then a Rooney song starts to play. and one of them is like, "oh, i love this band!" and then Oliver is like,

OLIVER: They're playing tomorrow night.
SETH: Yeah, but it's all sold out.
OLIVER: I can get tickets.
SETH: NO WAY?!! To see Rooney?!
OLIVER: Sure! I'm friends with the band.
MARISSA: You're friends with Rooney!?

it continued like this as i sat in awe. i couldn't believe it. and then suddenly, everyone had Rooney posters in their bedroom (and also Ben Folds posters!) and it was all anyone talked about. it was like, "HEY, are you going to the Rooney show tomorrow?!!?" TALK OF THE TOWN. it was awesome.

and THEN, they get to the concert and ROONEY WALKS OUT!!!! and Oliver, who is friends with the band is like,

OLIVER: Hey Robert!
ROBERT SCHWARTZMAN: Oh, hey man, how's it going?
OLIVER: Great. Have a great show!

and i'm like,

JULIE: NO FREAKING WAY.

ALL the Rooney guys were on The O.C.!!!! and it was super exciting. and then they all went into the concert and Rooney played "I'm Shakin'" and "Popstars." they closed with Popstars and i was like, "hm, i don't think they would ever do that."

it was awesome. really awesome.

and i was thinking, i wonder if THAT'S how Mischa Barton met Taylor Locke?!?! there was one scene that was like,

RYAN: I don't think I'm gonna go. I've never heard of Rooney.
SETH: You have to go, they're a great band!
RYAN: Yeah, but Marissa will be hanging out with Oliver...
ANNA: You have to go. There will be rockstars there. Girls can't resist rockstars.

(i'm quoting from memory. that's probably all wrong.) but you get the idea. the idea was that GIRLS LOVE ROCKSTARS. and man, it's so true.

anyways. it was super cool. and i can't wait for the Rooney summer tour! although, they've started to release press photos for the tour, and some album artwork - and there's only four of them. no Matt Winter. and it makes me sad.

i can't believe he's leaving the band. or, that he's left the band already. :( oh, Matt. you are missed, my friend.

but, Robert was tweeting this afternoon asking people who they would like Rooney to tour with. and i posted this message to him:

@rcschwartzman rooney + crash kings = best show i've ever seen.

if you're reading this from my actual blog, you can see that message in the Twitter feed to your left. if you're reading from Facebook - that's what the message said.

and i can say that was the best show i've ever seen, and that was without knowing ANY Crash Kings music. imagine how good it would be NOW!!!!!

all i remember from the first time i saw Crash Kings are these things:

1. they opened with 'Carry On' and immediately i thought, "holy crap this rocks and i have to remember this song to download when i get home." (only to find out, it's not on their record and i had to wait until Great Scott to hear it again.)
2. they played 'Raincoat' and made a remark about how it had been pouring all day
3. Tony's red plaid shirt and me thinking, "holy crap how come i don't have a red plaid shirt!?"
4. that i thought Jason was really attractive.
5. that i thought Mike was totally beautiful.
6. TONY.
7. that Kara said, "oooohhhhh yeah!!!!" when Tony said "It's Only Wednesday" had been in the movie Zombieland.
8. that my wool jacket was wet from the rain and it was making my arm really itchy.

that's it. THAT'S what i remember from the first time i saw Crash Kings. it took less than 24 hours for me to realize, "wait, i can't stop listening to this cd."

but, i didn't fall in love with Tony until i had that dream about him wearing the red plaid shirt. remember? and we were doing tequila shots.

i was thinking about that tonight. i've had not one, BUT TWO dreams where me and Tony are doing tequila shots. strange and sexy.

anyways.

i guess tonight is the horrible clock turning forward thing. UGH. one of my least favorite days of the whole year.

my other least favorite day of the whole year? the day we turn the clocks ahead.

it's so confusing. i strongly dislike it.

and, i'm pretty confused. because the past two nights i've been up overnight monitoring a newborn baby. up every three hours! and, if we turn the clocks ahead, what does that mean for his feeding time?

like, he'll get fed at 1am. but it will really be 2am. so then for the NEXT feeding, which is supposed to be at 4am, will really be at 5am??

i guess now it makes sense. i just needed to write it out. he's not actually missing a feeding. we're just switching the times. right? so he'll be on a 2am, 5am, 8am schedule instead of a 1am, 4am, 7am schedule. although, he usually doesn't eat until around 5am anyways.

and last night was weird, i went to bed at 3am and set my alarm for 4:05am. and it didn't go off. and i woke up for no reason at 4:45am and thought, "aw crap." went downstairs for the feeding and our resident was still sleeping. so, i woke her up and she said, "my alarm didn't go off!" and i said, "neither did mine!" and it was weird. her alarm was still plugged in, but it had totally shut off. like it was unplugged. the clock wasn't even on. i unplugged it and plugged it back in and it worked again. but it was very strange.

anyways. i'ts 11:35pm now. i think i'm going to eat something because i'm hungry. and watch more O.C. and then get ready to go downstairs at 1am, but really 2am. man that's confusing.

ok. this was supposed to be a short entry. i had only intended to talk about the 'Hey Kids' song and Rooney on The O.C.. but, as always, i lost control of my blogging.

i have more to tell you. but, tomorrow, i suppose.

have a great sunday! i'm going to be doing nothing. great!

take care. change the time on your clock. drive safely. be well.

I CAN'T BELIEVE ONE WEEK AGO WE WERE IN NEW YORK SEEING CRASH KINGS AND JET FOR THE FIRST TIME!!!!!!!!!

man, that makes me really sad. i wish last weekend could happen every weekend. and now we're pros at Crash Kings/JET concerts. yeah. total pros.

ok. sleep well. good afternoon, good morning and good night!!!



<3

CRASH KINGS ROADTRIP WEEKEND (featuring JET)

OH HI. i almost didn't see you there!!!!!

figured i'd start the most awesome blog entry with the most awesome greeting.

folks and friends, prepare to be rocked. this entry is going to be EPIC. both in length, pictures, links to videos which you must watch, and in awesome.

epically awesome. that's how i am going to describe this.

OH, GET EXCITED.

there are a lot of sexy guys ahead. sexy, pretty guys wearing tight pants. YEAH. now you're excited!

i know i updated you once from the hotel in Albany, but i'm going to do a little rewind and start from that show. because i have pictures!!!! hott hott pictures of hotties!!!!!! (that's another good way to describe this entry)



6 MARCH 2010 - Clifton Park, New York. (Neon blue "over 21" bracelet.)

me and my new friend Ryan meet up in Needham, Massachusetts. we start heading west on the Mass Pike at the absolute worst time of day. the sun with directly at eye level and not ideal for pre-concert rocking out.

Ryan made totally wonderful, delicious cookies for the weekend. YUM a lot.

after stopping at a CVS quickly we arrived at the venue. Northern Lights. i believe i told you that this place was in a strip mall in the middle of a dollar store and a church. but i think it's so strange and bizarre for a rock concert venue, that i will tell you again:

this place, Northern Lights, was in a strip mall, in between a dollar store and a church.

we walk into the place and just happen to pick the spot in the crowd next to Tony and Mike. of the band CRASH KINGS. oh, beautiful brothers. we talked to Tony for a few minutes and told him that we would be at the next few shows. he was very excited to hear this. and very appreciative of our superfandom.

the opening band was the scary band Owl. with the creepy drummer. they were screamy a lot and i didn't really get into the music at all.

this place was also very foggy. like, they had the fog machine set on "super" or something. i mean, when Crash Kings came onstage, i was standing pretty much right below Mike, and i could barely see Tony on the other side of the stage, as evidenced in these photos:



MIKE!!!!! AND TONY!!!!! bro shot!! you know how i love those bro shots. see how foggy?



TONY! kind of. his set up was different than the other three times i had seen them. he was playing on an actual piano this time. a very cool folding piano. and his clavinet was set up on top of it. he's such a pro.



Mike. hottie.

I had a really great view of Jason on drums at the NY show. and he kept looking over at me, i think because i knew all the words and was dancing. that made me excited.

and i got a great video of my fave song, 'Carry On.' at least, i think it's my favorite song. i really can't decide. every time i hear a Crash Kings song i think, "oh, it's my favorite!" they're all so freaking good.

what was great about Northern Lights was that the "loading area" where the bands load and unload all their stuff, was behind these big glass doors. so, you could see everything! which was awesome. especially when Tony was talking to that guy and he was laughing and smiling a lot. oohhhhhhh that smile. so, even after they went offstage, we could still see them hanging around outside.

and then we were waiting for JET. and they took a SUPER long time to come out. it almost made me think, "wow, these guys are divas." because they took so long. and people were getting really impatient. and then it was just getting silly.

and then they finally came out!!!!



IT'S JET!!!!!



It's Nic, the lead singer! one of the brothers in the band. his bro is the drummer. Mark? Rob? i don't know. hold on, i'll find out the guys names in jet.

Nic = lead singer
Chris = drummer
Cam = lead guitar
Mark = bass
Louis = keys

and Nic and Chris are the bros. which means that Cam, Mark and Louis would be in the Non-Brother Band, which will be the opening band on the Bro Tour 2011.



Nic liked to come to the front of the stage a lot. i tried to resist whipping out my camera like every other person. but, i did get this one shot.

also - he wore the same plaid shirt for all three shows. i made sure to document this. i guess it's kind of hard to see the plaid here. but, it's like a cream and navy plaid shirt. and in NY and NJ he wore this gray denim jacket over it. hip!

also - Jet = tight pants. you can't really see the tightness of all the boys pants here. but, i have also photo-documented this in later pictures... :)

BUT WOW - i loved Jet. i loved them a lot. they had a killer opening song, "She's A Genius" which they opened with all three nights. my favorite song of theirs is "Skin and Bones." LOVE IT. and, it was very exciting to hear them play, "Are You Gonna Be My Girl." they did not play the other slow song. all three nights they didn't play it. but, they totally rocked. a lot. a mega lot.

and then Ryan and i ventured over to our hotel, which took longer than expected due to crazy construction that didn't make any sense. the hotel was on this super wide road and the whole thing was just covered with orange cones and construction workers. it was very hard to find the path you were supposed to drive through.

and also making it hard was the fact that we had just been to a killer rock concert and didn't really care about anything else at that moment. eventually, we found the hotel and were able to figure our way into the parking lot.

and then i blogged. and then fell asleep around 3am. maybe it was 3:30am. i slept good.


7 MARCH 2010 - Sayreville, New Jersey. (lime green "over 21" bracelet.)


i awoke on sunday (emily's birthday!!!) at 9:30am. went to the lobby for the continental breakfast which consisted of bagels that were really small. definitely not normal sized bagels.

then came back to the hotel room. showered. watched Ryan's concert videos from the night before. SHE GOT A GREAT RECORDING of "All Along," which is a new Crash Kings song. this one might be my favorite. oh, it's so good. i strongly encourage you to watch that video because it's a beautiful song.

and then we drove.

we drove from the Albany area of New York to Sayreville, NJ. which was like, just over an hour south of New York City. it was a long drive. i think just around 4 hours.

we pull into the venue, The Starland Ballroom, which is across the street from a VFW hall. also very strange. i had never been to these concert venues that weren't like, right downtown in a city. where there was no parking. these places had huge parking lots. and Starland Ballroom was on this long road full of factories and other depressing things. it was also very strange.

but! we pull into the parking lot and it's empty. except for one other car.

so we get out of my car and walk over to the box office. it's closed and they won't even let us use the bathroom. lame.

and then we go back outside and see a girl walking over to us from the other car. she is a Jet fan!!! who got to the place super early in hopes of seeing/making out with Jet before the show.

Ryan and i tell her that we're Crash Kings fans, but saw Jet last night and really liked them. her name is Jenny. she had never heard of Crash Kings, but was excited to hear their music. so, we walked back over to my car, and had a jam sesh in the parking lot to the Crash Kings cd. it was awesome.

then we got hungry and ventured to the little strip mall at the end of the street. we ate at a Filipino barbeque place that was really good. and got to watch an episode of Hannah Montana that was playing on tv. bonus!

then we headed back over to the parking lot. i parked next to Jenny's car. she was from Manhattan. cool.

the Jet tour bus was parking out back. we had a great view of it. no Crash Kings van. i believe they call their van "Ol' Blue."

eventually, Ol' Blue drives up with the Crash Kings inside. freaking out ensues. yeah, it was pretty awesome. watching the guys unload stuff. and that folding piano must be pretty heavy because of all the obscenities we heard the guys yell whilst carrying it.

and after all their stuff was unloaded, Tony drove away in Ol' Blue WHILE texting on his iPhone. we were very concerned about his safety.

and then the crabby parking attendant guy made us move our cars into a straight line AND made us pay $6 for parking. LAME. more people started showing up. we got into line around 6:30. doors were at 7. we had been there since about 3:30. HARDCORE.

the place was pretty big inside. and there was a full bar around every corner. the opening band was called One Lonely Boy. no. that's not right. ONLY Lonely Boy. no! ONLY LIVING BOY. that was the band. Only Living Boy. i keep getting them confused with Los Lonely Boys and Badly Drawn Boy. and also, Simon and Garfunkel.

they were pretty good. i definitely liked them better than Owl.

haha, but, while we were waiting in the parking lot with Jenny, we told her that the opening band the night before was Owl. and she was like,

JENNY: Oh! Don't they sing that song....."Fireflies!?"
JULIE: NO!! I made that same mistake. That's Owl City. It's confusing.

remember that night? where i downloaded all that Owl City music because i thought they were the opening band? i vote that Owl change their name. i'm sorry! i'm not an Own fan. they scare me. and so does that owl on their website.

ANYWAYS. finally we get inside and get a good spot next to some other Crash Kings fans!!!!!!! AWESOME!



Tony being hott on the clav!!!



During "14 Arms," which might actually be my favorite song, Tony kept going between standing and sitting. and you could tell he just wanted to DANCE AND ROCK. and finally towards the end of the song, he stood up and KICKED the piano stool behind him. it went pretty far. and then he continued to rock.

AND, i got the whole song on video. you should watch that. great song. it's their most 'screamy' song. but i love it. and the piano stool kick is hotttt.




Jason on drums and Mike on bass!!!! if you haven't noticed already, Mike is wearing a tight plaid shirt. just something to point out...



See those post-it notes on Tony's clav? set list!!!! yep. he told us the night before that it might be boring going to three shows because they were going to play the same set. and then he was like, "i guess we'll have to switch it up!"

AND THEY DID. yeah they did. the set was different ALL THREE NIGHTS. because of us? probs. because they love us? probs again.




YYEEPP. tight shirt and tight pants. i have no problem with that.



IT'S JASON!!!! i feel like i never get a good pic of Jason. and i think this is a pretty good one.






Jason throwing his drum stick!!! what a great shot!




and all three of them. niiiice.

they played a killer set. and Tony was rocking out so hard at one point, that his soundboard which is to his left, fell right off the stand and knocked over two bottles of water on the floor. he picked it up very quickly and got back to rocking.

and then! Mike helped Tony move the clav to the front of the stage and they KILLED on their 'War Pigs' cover. remember how crazy i went when they did this in Providence? and i could barely describe it for you because it was so awesome? well, they did it again. and this time: i was prepared.

"War Pigs," Crash Kings.

in THAT video, Tony starts rocking so hard that the whammy bar on the clav almost falls off. he has to screw it back in real quick. i would very strongly encourage you to watch that video. it's PRIME TONY ROCKING. and jumping. and headbanging. and dancing. full out, "making love to the clavinet," to quote that reviewer from Bowdoin College. it's amazing to watch him. for serious. he's an amazing performer.

AND THEN WE SAW JET AGAIN!!!!!! they didn't take as long to come out onstage:



BOYS. WEARING. TIGHT. PANTS. yep.



please note the same outfit as the previous night.



and the classic, 'side head rocking' shot. remember my first Rooney concert i got that great shot of Robert Schwartzman doing the "side scream?" same idea as this photo, only with a scream.




this was when he came and stood on the speaker RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. what a great photo, right?!

and i got two Jet videos that night. but, i'm going to post someone else's video because it's the whole song and overall more exciting seeming than my video.

ARE YOU GONNA BE MY GIRL

i promise you'll recognize the song. my "blog singing lyrics posting" of Jet songs really don't do it justice.

"well it's a 123 take my hand and come with me because you look so fine that i really wanna make you mine!" cool.

i really enjoyed Jet again.

and then sadly, the show ended. we met up again with Jenny at our cars to say goodbye and exchange Twitter names so we could start following each other. she was super cool.

THEN came the marathon drive.

we left Sayreville, New Jersey just around midnight. got lost in Sayreville a lot. first, the directions were confusing. and second, Ryan got to talk to Tony for a while while Jet was playing and she was recounting their conversation and i was not paying any attention to road signs. or thinking about any productive to getting us on the Garden State Parkway. how can you when you're thinking of Tony? you can't.

Ryan had asked Tony what the meaning was behind some of their songs. awesome! except for the fact that he said he wrote "Non-Believer" about his girlfriend. but later on whilst recounting this, Ryan decided that him and his girlfriend had probably broken up. i wholeheartedly supported this. especially since i still think he wrote "Non-Believer" about me. i mean, come on.

"you're gonna light me up in a way i could never explain...."
"i would love you monday through 'til sunday...."

i mean, it's gotta be about me, right? OH so sweet.

it was on the drive back from NJ that Ryan spoke this piece of Crash Kings wisdom:

RYAN: Not only are they rock n' roll sex gods, they are excellent musicians, and overall really nice people.

how true!

we stopped for gas just south of NYC, i think.

AND THEN!!!!! something momentous happened. in New York City, just as "Come Away" was starting to play......

MY CAR HIT 100,000 MILES!!!!! yes! i got a picture of it with my phone, but i don't have the cord with me right now, so i can't show you. lame, right? i'll show you later.

around 4:30am we were both getting tired. so, we stopped at a rest stop on the Mass Pike to get coffee and a super second wind. and then entered Boston around 5am ish. maybe just after.

i dropped Ryan off at her apartment. sad times. and then i headed to Maine.

and i arrived in Berwick, Maine at 7am. not too bad, eh?

NJ
NY
CT
MA
NH
ME

all in one night!!! crazy times. and the Crash Kings' CD was playing the entire time. yep, the entire time. and the CD only lasts like, 36 minutes. that's a lot of repeat. but still, every song was super exciting.

and there was one time where we thought the Crash Kings van Ol' Blue was passing us on the highway. and we had a mini freak out moment. but, it wasn't. i mean, they were heading the same direction.

wow, what a great night.



8 MARCH 2010 - Berwick, Maine.



i went to bed around 8:30am after downloading a bunch of Jet songs that i liked.
slept until 2:30pm when Kara came and woke me up.
we went car shopping. lame.
came home and the power was out. for like, 4 hours. lame and cold.
power came back on and we went to get chinese food for supper. nice.
THEN,
Crash Kings tweeted. this was their tweet:
Just had a great dinner at our parents house in Boston with Jet!

how excited did this make me?? yeah, this made me really excited. to think that Jet was hanging out at the Crash Kings parents house?!?! OMG. they are friends!!!! and also rockstars.

and how lucky are Mike and Tony's parents?! they get to hang out with Crash Kings AND Jet! all while having their children home. aw, that must be great. right? to have your kids come home and be so successful?

i wonder if they all had a sleepover after this. oh, this makes me so excited.


9 MARCH 2010 - Boston, Massachusetts. (Neon orange "over 21" bracelet.)


woke up. put on my red plaid shirt in honor of the last CK show.
had breakfast at Friendly's. nice.
did more car shopping with Kara.
got a coconut coffee coolatta from Dunkin Donuts. not even out of the parking lot when i spill a bunch on the red plaid shirt.
go home. change out of the shirt.

after much stress and debate over whether Kara was going to attend the show with me, she decided not to. and then it was too late for me to drive in and take the T to The Paradise. so, i google mapped it and saw the The Paradise was about .8 of a mile away from Great Scott, where we saw Crash Kings and Paper tongues at the end of January. and we had no trouble parking there.

so, i drove there and parked. in front of a CVS. like, a block away from Great Scott.

and then walked really fast to the show. it was far. .8 of a mile is far when you know Crash Kings are waiting for you.

so, i finally arrive at the venue. it's a sold out show!!!! awesome!!!! good thing i already have my tickets.

i text Ryan and tell her that i'm here, and she tells me that she's in "our usual spot at stage right." i find her immediately.

she points out the "reserved" section on the side where Mike and Tony's parents and grandparents were sitting. along with all their friends. aw so exciting.

Crash Kings come out and the people go wild!!!! THE BAND goes wild!!!!! you could tell right away that they were super excited to be performing at home.


ALSO, what's that Tony is wearing?



YEP. the freaking red plaid shirt. that he was first wearing at The Middle East when i first heard Crash Kings. the red plaid shirt that made me say, "holy crap why don't i have a red plaid shirt?!"

so, on the morning on march 9th, two thousand and ten both myself and Tony woke up and thought, "i'll wear my red plaid shirt today." only, clearly, Tony did not spill coffee coolatta on his. SON OF A GUN why am i so bad at eating and drinking?

ANYWAYS,

Ryan took a video of the song, "You Got Me." which is possibly the sexiest song ever. ooooo the bass line. it's the kind of song that you hear, and then you feel like you need to take a shower, it's so dirty and as Ryan said, "raunchy." it sounds sweaty. Ryan and i were talking about it while listening to it in the car at one point and she said something along the lines of, "can't you just imagine the music video to this?" YEAH. and then we giggled to ourselves.

IT'S A SEXY SONG. and she got a sexy video of it. it's hott and sweaty. and Tony turns back to us at the end and smirks and sexy smirk. oooooooyeah.




and i got a great video of the end of "All Along." including the end of the clavinet solo.

the Boston show was the best out of the three shows. they totally rocked. and you could tell they were just so excited to be playing their hometown. for their parents and friends.

and this time, Tony was rocking so hard at one point that the clavinet became unplugged! so he had to do a quick switch over to piano instead.




and they played War Pigs at the end and again, totally killed and rocked the hell out of it. and the crowd went crazy.

and it was awesome. it was so awesome. there aren't really any words to describe the Crash Kings awesome, because it is so different than a normal awesome.

i've seen them 6 times now. that's 6 times in three months. and not for one minute does their show get any less exciting. it's like you can't take your eyes away from them for a split second because they are so freaking good that you don't want to miss anything.

it's crazy. if i could post every Crash Kings video on youtube for you, i would. because it's all so good. and i can't stress enough that i think you will love them. if you haven't started listening to Crash Kings now then GO.

also, why haven't you? i've been talking about them nonstop for three months, don't you think i'm on to something?

Crash Kings will be rocking South by Southwest in like, a week, and here's an excerpt from a "SXSW preview article," as i will call it:
I’m not exaggerating a bit when I tell you Crash Kings put on one of the greatest indie rock shows I’ve seen in the past year. A few weeks ago I caught this buzz band at the Viper Room – it was one of those shows so unique, so exciting, so inspiring I couldn’t help but imagine Crash Kings selling out stadiums in the future.

YEP. that guys loves them.

ok wait, before i get too carried away, let's finish the concert:




OH YEAH, Jet was there too!!! Again! Now i've seen them three times and totally love it.



note: same plaid shirt. by the third time it was great because i actually knew some of the songs and some of the words. i didn't feel like a completely lost Jet fan. and i would totally see these guys again, even if they weren't on tour with Crash Kings.

AND - there was a great moment where Nic thanked Crash Kings for being on tour with them, and everything. BUT THEN - he said,

NIC: These guys are from Boston and last night we all went over to their parents house and had a great dinner!! Thank you so much!!

and then the spotlight went on Tony and Mike's parents in the crowd and everyone went crazy. it was really cool.

i'm so happy that Crash Kings and Jet are BFF.

and every now and then we'd see Mike rocking out in the crowd. with his friends. and a beer.

and then after the show! we were waiting around and Mike just happened to be hanging out with his friends and Ryan overheard his friends telling him this story about sexual acts happening in someone's driveway. Mike thought this was hilarious, while us members of the Crash Queens didn't quite think so.

and then we said a few short words to Mike, who was clearly drunk. he shook our hands and thanked us profusely for coming to the show and said how great it was to see us again.

we then all moved outside The Paradise and met up with other Crash Kings fans. WHO, you ask? WELL, do you remember at the Great Scott show, there was the girl who let me and Kara borrow her sharpie so we could get them to sign the set list????

SHARPIE GIRL was there!!! and we became friends with her! her name is Jo. and she is super awesome. and she remembered me!!! we talked with her for a long time. she said that she had seen Tony run out of The Paradise with some members of Jet and some of his friends and they were all going to a bar down the street.

and we had some very insightful conversation outside of The Paradise....

"Mike might actually be prettier than Tony, it's just that Tony has this incredible stage presence that makes you just fall in love with him."

yeah, that's what we mainly talked about....

anyways. it was great. a great show. a great night. a great four days.

wow. SUCH a great four days. i can't even believe how awesome it was. and i can't believe how much fun i had and how many amazing people i met! and i heard great new music! and went to new places!!

IF THE CRASH KINGS/JET TOUR IS COMING TO A CITY NEAR YOU: i would advise you to purchase tickets immediately. if you're not a Jet fan, if you're not a Crash Kings fan - you will be.

both bands are amazing and they mesh together really well.

i know i have friends in both Colorado Springs AND Austin. both cities where the tour will be going. now, i won't name any names............ but Dave, Renee and Elizabeth - you should go to those shows. and then photo-document the night so it feels like i was there.

if i had enough money, i would FLY to those cities and go with you. and pay for the cost of your tickets. THAT'S how strongly i feel about this.

ok.

i feel really good about this entry. i've been working on it off and on for about 7 hours. no joke. i was at work. and now i'm at home. and i took a few pauses in writing. but yeah. i'm tired.

i've got more to say, but i'm going to save it for a later date.

epically awesome? totally. hott hott pictures of hotties?? yep. i think i fulfilled my end of the bargain.

also, i watched a video of Jet performing thursday night in Richmond, VA and - Nic was wearing that same plaid shirt. for realz. the same one. i really hope there is a washing machine on that tour bus.

OK. please go back now and watch all those videos that you didn't watch before. ok, go!

heck, i'm STILL so excited from the Crash Kings Roadtrip Weekend. i'm still wearing my bracelets.

also, there have been two times this past week where i have been listening to songs featuring an electric guitar. and i hear the guitar, but automatically picture Tony playing it on the clav. like, how he would do it and how he would look. and both of these times i have to remind myself that it's not Tony playing the clav - it's an actual guitar. strange.

anyways. ok, now i'm really going to go. because now you're just getting sick of me. i can feel it. i guess i don't know how to end this massive, epically awesome entry.





Tony's shirt says it all.



have a great day.


<3

opposites

i have so much GOOD to tell you about, you won't even believe it.

SO. MUCH. GOOD. has happened recently. and it's been amazing and exciting and totally beautiful and awesome.

but!

i'm not going to do it right now. i have to go to the post office. and some reading of car manuals. and perhaps other things.

oh, i have to go buy cat litter.

but just know, that EVERYTHING bad that happened last week has been counteracted by everything good from this week.

OMG. SOOOOO GOOD. and i made wonderful new friends!

ok. i'm going to do those few boring things and then get right to the exciting things.

awesome. ok. i'll talk to you later.



GET EXCITED.

<3

CLIFTON PARK, here we come

oh wait! we're already here!!!!!!!!!

actually, we've already come and gone. now we're in Latham, NY. staying at the Super 8. i'm here with my new friend Ryan. she's very cool and made totes delish cookies for both me AND for Crash Kings.

today was a hectic, stressful day that turned out to be a great day.

- went to bed around 2am.
- couldn't fall asleep
- phone call woke me up at 7am
- alarm woke me up at 8am
- another phone call woke me up at 8:15am

"ok, maybe i should get up."

- then i went down to work. i ended up being down in the office from about 8:30 to 11ish.

OH WAIT. i haven't talked to you since thursday afternoon. no, friday afternoon.

i'll catch you up.

so, the hospital went fine. i had planned to go run errands after i left the hospital, but instead, i needed to go back to the house and make some phone calls.

those "some" phone calls turned into a billion phone calls. a billion frantic phone calls and message leaving to people. it was hectic and stressful. i ended up being in the office from 7:22 until like, 10pm.

THEN i went out to the Jake's 'vacuum your car' place and vacuumed my car. i was kind of excited about this but also kind of dreading it. but, it needed to be done. so i took the huge vacuum and vacuumed the car. it came out alright.

it was freezing outside. i couldn't feel my hands by the end of it. why are the underside of car mats so sharp?? it's not like they stick to the car any better.

then i went to walgreens. i had wanted to go to wal-mart, but now they were closed. and walgreens is 24 hours. i bought eye drops and cold medicine.

then i came home and watched The Office. jim and pam had their baby on the same day that our resident had her baby! aw, what a great episode.

THEN, i went to bed.

ok, up to speed.

now, it's saturday morning and i'm in the staff office again making all kinds of frantic phone calls. from 8:30am to 11ish am. i was chatting with courtney online the whole time which was cool and nice.

then i went upstairs and started to get ready to GO ON THE CRASH KINGS ROADTRIP WEEKEND. holy crap i was so excited.

so, i leave my house around 2pm. head to Needham, MA to pick up my new Crash Kings BFF.

THEN, we headed west on the Pike towards NEW YORK!!!

arrived in Clifton Park just after 8pm.

the scary band Owl (not to be confused with the super cute band, Owl City) was just coming on. they all look like the guys in Nickelback. with really long hair. and they screamed a lot.

but! we both kind of decided to grab a spot in the back of the crowd and we walk up and are standing there for a moment and then we realize we are standing right next to Mike and Tony of CRASH KINGS.

we both look at each other and have a mini freak out session.

wow. Mike looks so soft. every time i see Mike in person, all i want to do is touch him. he looks so soft. i just want to hug him.

so then we kind of talk to Tony for a minute. he is beautiful.

then Owl stopped playing and Crash Kings started setting up. they brought a piano onstage!!! HOTTTTTTTT.

it was very foggy in this place. it was called Northern Lights. it's this giant music/night club in this plaza strip mall sandwiched in between a dollar store and a church. it was very strange.

so then Crash Kings started. SO GOOD. omg. i actually saw Jason get on stage and take off his shoes. that was exciting. i was pretty much right in front of Mike. Tony was across the stage, but i could barely see him because of all the fog. for realz! so foggy!

anyways - they rocked. so hard. they played Carry On and i got it all on video. i didn't take very many pictures because i was so concentrated on rocking. NOBODY else was! so we had to be the hardcore fans. no prob.

EVERYBODY started rocking during Mountain Man.

and then it was over! too short. AND - it was maddening because JET took FOREVER to get onstage. seriously. FOREVER. like, maybe 20 minutes. so, Crash Kings should have played longer. much longer.

but holy man - JET. they rocked the house. the people loved them. i loved them. i was super dancing through every song. they are so cute. and they wore such tight pants. and they are from austrailia. and two of them are brothers. i am really excited to have them on the Bro Tour 2011.

i will take JET videos and pictures either at the show sunday night or tuesday night.

YEAH. i still have two more shows!!!!!! how exciting is this adventure?!?!?!

i really liked JET. i think you're supposed to write their name in all caps. because they are exciting like that.

they didn't set up their own stuff on stage, though. i guess they're more famous than i thought. there was this little kid like, maybe 8 years old in front of me. and he was with his parents. and he knew like, every word to every song. it was incredible.

yeah, i really liked them. they fit really well with Crash Kings. in terms of rocking. and music style.

AH. what a great night.

and my new friend Ryan said that she was hanging around the back again while JET was taking forever to start, and she started talking to Tony again. and they talked for like, 10 minutes.

AND AND AND. he was super excited that we were seeing three of their shows as an opening band. he said he really appreciated that we were coming out to the shows.

AND THEN HE SAID, "see you tomorrow!"

which basically means, "let's all make out tomorrow!"

yeah. i'm pretty sure that's what he meant.

oh boy. i am excited.

so tomorrow (sunday 7 march) we're driving to new jersey. for more Crash Kings/JET wonderfulness.

we're going to plan to be at the venue early. ya know, to either jam with the band. or help them sound check. or pick out outfits for the show. any of those would work.

i'm really excited to see JET again. yeah, they rocked.

and then after the show sunday night we'll drive back to boston. and then i'll drive to maine. and then back to boston on tuesday!!!!!!!

ok. i'm getting tired. we just watched Ryan's videos from the show. she has the amazing power of taking great Tony videos. i am bad at videos because i can't stop dancing and singing. i can't stop the rock!

we were just looking through photos of Crash Kings on facebook. TONY. WEARING. GLASSES. yeah, i had a mini crazy moment. oh wow.

OK. how happy am i that i am away from Lebanon, NH and i'm on the Crash Kings Roadtrip Weekend? I AM SO HAPPY.

after this seriously bad week at work, this is just what i need. and i actually thought that tonight while rocking out. it was every opposite feeling from all week. same intensity, only on the good side.

OK. now i might go to sleep. lots of driving tomorrow. my car did well up until the very end. like, from the concert to the hotel. i started to worry. it got much louder. and stopped shifting gears. and now the heat makes this weird 'flicking' noise. and it's screechy. just overall making noises it's not supposed to.

but, we had a talk before i left NH this morning. i said, "dear car, i know you are not feeling well and will not last long after this. but you have never failed me. please just hold on a couple more days." and then i played it some Crash Kings to let it know what it was holding out for. and it ran really well all the way over to NY.

ok. now i might go to sleep.

TODAY!!!!!!! IS EMILY'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!! happy birthday emily! dear friend. i miss you and love you!!!!!!! we will see each other soon. promise.

AND - happy academy awards day.

folks, i will not be watching it live this year. the first year in 12 years? i think so. actually, no. the year Moulin Rouge was nominated i had a dance competition and couldn't watch either. that was lame.

but this year, i am willingly not watching in order to attend the concert. and i am happy about my decision. excited, in fact. yes, i am sad a little.

i predict:

- THE HURT LOCKER - will win most categories

i don't think i can finish watching that movie. it was good and all, but with the way things are going at work, after a long, stressful, anger filled day, i don't want to sit on the couch and wonder if the guy on the screen is about to be blown up. it's just not something i want to see or deal with.

The O.C.? yes please. keep 'em coming, Netflix.

AND, i am rooting for Fantastic Mr. Fox ALL THE WAY.

ok maybe i'm more sad than i thought.

no. don't think about it. i'll be rocking out instead.

i think i might wear my hair in a low, side ponytail. i don't know why that is the look i am envisioning.

OK. for real? now will i go to bed??? ummm. maybe, actually.

it's 2:07am. Maine time!!!! get it???

Ryan and i were REALLY, REALLY hoping that the band was staying at our hotel and that we would run into them late night at the ice machine in their pajamas. yeah, we discussed this in the car. it was a meaningful conversation.

and when she was detailing her conversation with Tony for me i said, "please say he invited us out to dinner with them." unfortunately, that hasn't happened YET.

ok, so the bass player in JET looks like Ned from Rooney. and the piano player in JET reminded me of Matt Winter (formerly) of the band Rooney. :( but the bass player totally looked like Ned. and he had a cute little haircut. they were all cuties.

i am a JET fan! and after this adventure i will have seen them three times!!! we will all be bff.

OK. now i think i will go to sleep. because now i'm really tired.

i hope you're having a great weekend. talk to you again soon. probably from Maine. or, any spot we get wi-fi in tomorrow.

ok! great!!!! love you!! goodnight!!!! good morning!!!! good afternoon!!!!!



<3

chilly

AH i'm cold.

just got back inside after cleaning out my car. cleaning out all the junk. at first it was fun, because i was listening to good music and getting stuff done. but then it just ended up being a bummer. i guess because, when it comes down to it, i like the car. and i'll be sad to see it go.

i still had bags of stuff in my trunk from when i moved out of Hampshire. i found all my Day in the Lab stuff. that i did with jenny. that was fun.

found about 100 cd's. MAN i burned a lot of cd's. alll kinds of different mixes.

AND i found 5 euro!! that was pretty exciting.

so tonight, here is my plan:

- be at the hospital from 5-7pm
- go do some errands at wal-mart. yuck.
- go to the Jake's car vacuum place to vacuum out the car

that sounds like a pretty good plan.

oohhhhhh i don't know. i guess i'm kind of bummed out right now.

and cold. it's pretty cold out.

last night i washed all my flannel sheets and re-fluffed my bed up. oooooo it was sooo nice sleeping last night.

ok. i think i'll take a quick shower. and then i have to go.

OK. have a good day. i'll talk to you later.


<3

perspective:

this is a PS to the entry below this one....

remember last year when i had the stomach flu? and i was totally miserable for like, four days? and i had also those crazy fever dreams. and couldn't eat, couldn't sleep? total bad.

well, that was THIS WEEK, only LAST YEAR.

and last night, after coming back upstairs from all the bad, i actually thought, "would i actually feel better if i had the stomach flu?"

and it took me a while to think about it.

and ultimately, i think no. i don't think i would rather have the stomach flu. but, the fact that i thought about it is a little insight into this bad week.


and that is all.

with 14 arms we'll execute the point

i have my music turned up really loud because i'm the only person in the house right now.

remember when i bought my new speakers? yeah, i like them.

so why am i alone, you ask? well, because there are no residents in the house. last night we had two, and now we temporarily have zero. and that means i'm alone in the big house.

Caretaker Julie. that's what i like to think.

anyways. i believe when i last talked to you i was super optimistic that my wednesday night at work would go well. ah yes, i fondly remember the time before my wednesday night at work.

actually, NO, i DON'T fondly remember that time because wednesday was a crap day. let me fill you in on what happened to my car....


I am sitting in the car place. My car is in the garage part for maybe like, ten minutes. Maybe not even ten minutes. I suppose just long enough for them to run the scan test which cost me $48.

CAR GUY: (comes out of the back room) Well, I don't have good news.
JULIE: Aw...
CAR GUY: Actually....I have very, very bad news.
JULIE: ....Ok....
CAR GUY: So, the car's not going to pass inspection...
JULIE: ....Ok....
CAR GUY: And it's going to be about $2,000 worth of work until it does pass.
JULIE: .....Umm......what?
CAR GUY: Yeah, the scan gave us a bunch of problem codes....some of them we don't even know what they are. You'd have to talk to the manufacturer. It's mainly the transmission.
JULIE: I need a new one...
CAR GUY: Yeah you do.
JULIE: (should i laugh or cry? laugh or cry? laugh or cry?)
CAR GUY: We can give you a 60-day inspection sticker, after you get two new tires and a new exhaust pipe.
JULIE: Is that what's making the car so loud?
CAR GUY: Yep. And wow, that right, front tire is bad. I'm surprised I can't see the metal! Must've been a fun winter!
JULIE: Haha... actually....not so much!
CAR GUY: Haha.
JULIE: So, how much would that be?
CAR GUY: The tires and the exhaust pipe would be probably around $300. For 60 days.
JULIE: Do you think that's worth it if I can't fix the transmission?
CAR GUY: Well.... no, probably not. This car is just going to turn into a money pit. We had one guy with almost the exact same problems as you, same car, and he just left it here - didn't even drive it away.


yep. basically, here's the abbreviated version:


JULIE: Hey! Here's $48, tell me something bad!
CAR GUY: Your car sucks!


so that's the car story. i need a new one. and pretty much like, right now. because i can't drive around with an loud, uninspected car for too long.

i feel bad, because now i kind of resent the car. much like with my old laptop. like, it would break and break and break and break - but it always came back! i could always fix it. and then there's that one time where it can't be fixed. and it dies. and you lose all your Phantom Planet concert photos on the hard drive. yeah, still mad about that.

was it last summer that i thought my cell phone, laptop and car would all die? The Summer of Three. was that what i called it? that's what i should have called it.

instead, last summer brought the death of my cell phone.
early winter brought the death of my laptop.
late winter brought the death of my car.

and i have absolutely no idea what i'm going to do about the car.

really, like no idea. drive it to the death, i guess. i mean, if i hadn't gone to the car appointment yesterday, then i wouldn't know about all the problems. and i would keep driving it.

today i actually looked at the inspection sticker from 2010 and thought, "hm, is there any way i could change the '2010' to '2011?'"

i don't think there is. i'm not Veronica Mars.

ANYWAYS. that's the first bad part of the day.

and then i was strangely optimistic about work that night. excited, even, to get downstairs. something to take my mind of the car thing, perhaps.

i walk downstairs and open the office door. the FIRST thing my boss says to me when i walk in:

MY BOSS: Good luck.

and that just brought it right back down. within five minutes of being there, i had to go upstairs and tell the residents to stop horsing around and please stop yelling.

it was all downhill from there.

ok, so you know how in some episodes of dramatic television shows, it will start out at the end and then work it's way back? like, at the horrible part where something has blown up, someone has died, something is on fire, etc. and then you'll see like, five minutes of that and then the screen will go black and it will say like, "14 hours earlier." and you will think, "wow, how the hell does it get to be that bad?!?!"

that's how the episode of wednesday night would start out. and it would start with me, sitting in the office. one of the girls sitting in the armchair screaming at me, and the other one standing in the doorway screaming at me. basically obscenity after obscenity after more obscenities. nothing that i can write here.

i don't think i have ever been more insulted in my whole life. and BOY, did i tell them that. well, i told one of them that.

she was standing there, screaming at the top of her lungs how horrible i was. how horrible it was here. how i didn't care about her, or anybody else one tiny bit. how i pretend like i care, but i really don't.

i mean, i'm dumbing it down here. it was BAD. and so finally i cut her off and basically said something like,

JULIE: Ok, STOP. I am so fed up with this right now and I'm so insulted that you would speak to me like that. I never speak to you like that, even when I'm as angry as I am right now. I'm also insulted that you think I don't care about any of this, when I've worked with you, and supported you for all these months! And if you listen to yourself, it doesn't make sense - because all you do is say that nobody cares about you and nobody supports you, but you don't let anybody support you! I tried to talk this over with you earlier and you didn't want to hear any of it.
RESIDENT: (swearing swearing swearing bad words very bad words swearing swearing)
JULIE: Ok, that's enough. I'm done talking about this.

and then i turned away and she stormed off into the living room. and that was just one of them. then i had to deal with the other.

it was bad. i think it was worse than the horrible night on monday, but only because i was alone. on monday night, i had two other staff there for most of the night to help deal with it. but last night i was allll alone.

i was on the phone with my boss like, every 20 minutes. oh, it was so bad.

the whole thing probably lasted about 2 hours. and then i was all shaken up. like after a car accident or something. and even when i was back at home, i couldn't even sit down. i was so wound up and so shaken.

and i couldn't fall asleep. and once i finally did fall asleep at like, 2:45am, i had to wake up at 6:15am and deal with part 2.

i really don't like being screamed at.

but, i think through the whole thing i pretty much kept calm. i was raising my voice towards the end.

and now! i'm alone in this house.

and my music is still really loud. and i'm making good use of the two washers and two dryers now that i'm alone.

so, today went completely different than expected.

i was supposed to be in the operating room during a c-section today. for the girl who was screaming her brains out at me last night. and after that was all over, i called the other birth coach and basically said, "look, things have totally blown up over here, i don't think i can go to the appointment tomorrow. i think me and resident one need some time away from each other."

and she understood. and took her to the appointment early in the morning. i was very thankful for this.

i called her about 1pm to see how things were going. she called me back about 2pm and asked if i wanted to come up around 3pm. everything went fine.

so, i got dressed and ready to go and went up to the hospital at 3pm.

BABY. tiny, tiny baby. omg. beautiful tiny baby. and i held him for like, three hours.

no, i'm not kidding. i stayed at the hospital for about 4 hours. and i was holding him for MOST of the time. and i changed his diaper!

i got there at 3pm, and he was about 4 hours old. that's the youngest baby i've ever held. can you imagine being 4 hours old??? having to realize that you have to cry when you're hungry or when you want your diaper changed? and it hurts newborn babies to cry. to have to open your eyes and look at stuff. be undressed and cold for the first time ever. to have to be passed from person to person and checked out by doctor after doctor.

and all for the first time ever. EVER! it's so crazy.

and i totally had a crush on the pediatrician that came in to 'inspect' him. he passed inspection, unlike my car. the pediatrician had curly black hair and a pretty full beard. loves it. and when i said that i was a staff member from Hannah House he said, "oh, that's great!"

yep.

anyways. so, i guess the day turned out alright because i got to hold a little, little baby. and all you can do when you hold a newborn baby is just look at them. and fix their little hat. and rub their soft little cheek.

it's weird too, looking at the baby. because i remember when you couldn't even tell that this resident was pregnant. and now today i was holding her baby.

and i also couldn't stop thinking, "i'm so sorry you had to hear all that last night!" poor little guy. already exposed to R rated language.

oh, but he was beautiful.


and then i drove my car home. it's not totally loud all the time. mainly just at slow speeds. too bad i hate driving fast.

anyways. i guess that's all. it's friday. i'm burnt. feeling very burnt.

and i better have A FREAKING AWESOME second half of the year. that is all i am going to say. because so far, this half isn't so great. and it's really starting to get to me.


alright. i hope everyone else had a good week. and i hope everyone has a good weekend. the Crash Kings Roadtrip Weekend is still up in the air.

but i really am going to think positive about that one. please everyone send positive Crash Kings vibes into the universe.

even if it's the trip that breaks my car. it will still be worth it.


love you.

<3

not a good sign

it's not a good sign when the day majorly goes wrong BEFORE going into work.

FINAL RESULT OF THE INSPECTION: Rejected.

that's what it says on the form! it couldn't say something like,

FINAL RESULT OF THE INSPECTION: Sorry, but not today.

or,

FINAL RESULT OF THE INSPECTION: Try again next time!

something with a little bit of hope.

ah, but there's no hope for my car today.

anyways. can't talk about it right now. i just got off the phone with my dad. he called to see what was up.

folks, it's not looking good.

ONE of the many things wrong with the car are the two front tires. the guy was like,

CAR GUY: Wow, it must have been a fun winter for you! I'm surprised I can't see the metal showing through on those tires.

and i'm thinking, "yesterday i was on dry pavement and i didn't think the car was going to stop."

true story.

ANYWAYS. now it's time to go make my day worse and go to work.

WAIT. NO. STOP IT JULIE.

have a good attitude!!! maybe it will be a great night!

it's only wednesday? NO! it's only wednesday! so many great things can still happen before the week ends.

okay, i will make them happen.

but first i will go to work.


have a great night! and i will too!!!!!! DEAL!


<3

but it's only in her dream

OKAY.

in one hour i have my car inspection. worried and dreading are what i'm feeling right now about that. UGH. please let it just pass and i won't have to pay any extra money.

Ruby is sitting on my lap right now. like, not even laying down. she's just sitting. and every once in a while she'll lean her head back real far to look at me, and i kiss the top of her head. i love her so much.

i can't actually remember why i started this post. i thought i had something important to tell you.

i started watching The Hurt Locker last night. i haven't finished it yet. i thought so far it was okay. all those guys are horrible.

i feel like i need a haircut again. it's only been like, 2 months.

i'm working tonight 3:30-10pm. i think it's gonna suck. only because my boss sent me an email confirming that i would work tonight and she said, "it's been a rough morning. i'll fill you in later."

and whenever i hear that i immediately think, "oh why did i agree to work?"

but, if i got through Monday night. and i got through the night when i almost got punched in the face, then i an probably get through tonight.

TOMORROW will be the real test.

i will be in the operating room during a c-section. when did i ever think i'd be doing that in my life? um, never. how am i going to get through that? i don't know. it will be a tough day.

but hopefully CRASH KINGS this weekend. three times in four days. EPIC. it's weird though, thinking that tomorrow i will probably have this horribly emotional day that includes being there when a baby is born, and then this weekend i might be rocking my socks off at a concert.

life is strange, right?

apparently, Crash Kings are carting around an actual piano for these shows. i learned that via @crashkings twitter. i think it's Tony who does the tweeting. and he said that they were driving through the Rocky Mountains and getting around 8mpg because of the piano.

they start the JET tour on friday. in TORONTO!!!!!! all your Toronto readers - GET OUT THERE!

oh! here's something good:

i spent probably almost 40 minutes in the post office yesterday mailing two big boxes to British Columbia. one to my dad and one to my uncle. and the first time around i filled out the wrong customs forms for BOTH packages. so i had to go do everything again.

but!!!!! the ruggedly handsome postal worker was helping me out. and i hadn't seen him in a very long time. and that made me very happy. he's so funny and lovely. and so ruggedly handsome.

OK. i should go get ready to go to the car appointment. UUGGHHH i don't want to gooo.

my car hit 99,300 miles yesterday! that's exciting. do you think it will hit 100,000 by tuesday?? from (hopefully) driving to boston, then to new york, then to new jersey, back to boston, probably back up here, then back to boston and back up here. that sounds like 700 miles, right?

eh, i have no idea.

AH, okay. now i really have to go get ready. wish me luck. i transferred some money around in my bank accounts so that i have enough. oooohhhhh please let it be enough. i think something is wrong with the engine. and also the transmission. but the transmission thing has been forever. i think the engine thing is new.

ok. have a great day. i'll talk to you later!



<3, julie

greener seems to fall beneath your feet

okay today was a bad day. but i'm listening to Tally Hall right now and they are making me feel better.

i ended up working tonight 3:30 to 10pm. sure, why not!? i really expected it to be a quiet night.

go downstairs. check in with the staff.

i'm downstairs maybe 15 minutes and the screaming begins.

SCREAMING. FIGHTING. NAME-CALLING. DOOR SLAMMING. did i mention screaming? and lots of crying.

this lasted pretty much nonstop until around 6:30 or so. actually maybe more like 7. i don't know.

i was so frustrated i wanted to cry. like, if i hadn't pulled it together in 5 seconds, i would have burst into tears. instead, i bottled. and immediately began shaking. which, still hasn't stopped.

have i ever been that angry and frustrated? so much so that i started shaking? i can't remember. i'm questioning the night back in the fall that i almost got punched in the face. but, that may have been shaking out of plain fear.

i was SO ANGRY tonight. SO FRUSTRATED. it was horrible. it was horrible.


so, my boss called me at 12:30pm and asked if i would work tonight. i figured i really needed the money.

when i got to work, she told me that she had already been so frustrated and fed up by 12:30pm, after 4.5 hours of working, and she didn't think she could make it the rest of the night.

then, she called me again at the end of the night to check in to see how i was doing and she said to me (this is a quote):

BOSS: This was one of the worst days I have ever put in.


BAD. it was bad.

and i don't think the rest of the week will be too great either...

TUESDAY: staff meeting. hopefully not too bad.
WEDNESDAY: car appointment. probably spending a lot of money.
THURSDAY: dreading. dreading. dreading.
FRIDAY: we'll see.

SATURDAY: Crash Kings in New York?! maybe?! hopefully?!!?!
SUNDAY: Crash Kings in New Jersey!? HOPEFULLY!!!!!!!
MONDAY: spend either in Maine or New Hampshire. maybe?!
TUESDAY: Crash Kings in Boston?! MAYBE?!!?

this weekend has the possibility to ROCK SO FREAKING HARD. i've been in seriously awesome contact with the girl who i might Crash Kings Roadtrip with. IF the whole thing happens.

which, it's looking like it will.

AAHHHHHH CRASH KINGS THREE TIMES IN FOUR DAYS!!!!!!!!!!!

wow this weekend could totally rock. i just need to get there. oooooo i really hope it happens. reaaallyyyyyy reaallyyyyy hope.

this girl who i've been emailing, who will come with me this weekend if it all happens, sounds like the exact version of myself. it's like myself in another person.

we're creating these versions of how this weekend could go that include hanging out with the band every free second.

like, "well, this is our plan for food...unless we end up eating all our meals with the band."
or, "okay, this is our hotel plan... unless we end up staying with the band."
or, "we'll have to find stuff to do on sunday afternoon... but that's when maximum band hangout time could happen...."

so cool.


DEAR UNIVERSE,

please go the exact opposite of today and make everything good happen from now on.
ok thanks bye!

LOVE, JULIE


OH.

so, while we're on the subject of bad things happening in the world. (well, i guess this on a smaller scale of the bad things happening in the world...)

MATT WINTER is leaving Rooney.

it was announced last week. the day before my birthday. MATT WINTER. leaving. ROONEY.

oh, it was a sad day. i am sad. especially because i am totally in love with Matt Winter.

he's going to medical school to become a doctor. which, i guess is a great thing. he said it's something he's always wanted to do. yeah, that's great. but still sad.

and crazy that Kara and I saw Rooney on the last tour with all original members! AND that i got all their signatures on my Rooney shirt! including Matt's!

i guess in the celeb world you call them "autographs," not "signatures." geeze julie, pull it together.

oh, but i still remember standing there, shaking Matt Winter's hand and looking into his beautiful eyes. ooooo that was a really great moment. and he was wearing that icy blue shirt.

i just realized that i was tensing up while i have been typing. i had to take a relaxation moment.

anyways.

ok. i am really hungry and i think that is now contributing to my shakiness and headache. i'm going to go eat something and probably watch more 30 Rock. i had been having a good day before work because i was getting caught up on 30 Rock. soooooo funny.

i have The Hurt Locker here from netflix, but i don't think i can watch it tonight.


i'll talk to you again tomorrow. have a good tuesday.


<3