"you can't say you'll start a revolution"

i just learned that in the year 2009 i blogged 296 times. keep in mind a few things:

1. that is from THIS blog, on Blogger. i didn't start this blog until the end of March. i still had the livejournal.

i just checked over at livejournal and in the first three months of 2009 i blogged 113 times.

113 + 296 = 409

that's a little over one post every day for a whole year......... i feel pretty good about myself. some people may look at it like, "wow, she has no life. she blogged 409 times last year!" but no. i look at it like, "wow, look at the interesting life that i lead! i just want to tell everyone about it!!"

or i guess it could be, "she has no friends so she has to blog more than once a day."

but, there are some days where i don't blog at all! that means that other days i blog way more than once.

remember that week last august where i blogged 22 times? yeah. there are seven days in a week last time i checked. not 22. that's like, almost a whole extra february.

ooo wouldn't it be great if there were two februarys!?!? then i would have two birthdays a year!!!!

OH!!! here's something that i want to talk about. it's important, so listen closely.

you know how i like to talk about the laws that i will put in place once i am president? WELL, i've thought of a new one.

let's review them:

1. drive-thru post offices
2. alphabetized grocery stores

AND - WAIT FOR IT.......

3. every person working in this country will be entitled to a PAID HOLIDAY on their birthday

yes. you know how every employer is different with what they consider "holidays" and what they don't. there are the big ones like christmas, thanksgiving. and then there are the weird ones like 4 july, labor day.

WELL. that will stay the same. what will change, is that ON YOUR BIRTHDAY you will get another holiday.

so say a company gives their employees 7 holidays a year. well MY LAW would give them 8, because everyone has a birthday, right? it doesn't matter if you're part time or full time - you'll get the birthday holiday.

will this be a day off for school children? NO. stay in school! get an education. it's the most valuable thing you'll ever have.

BUT, say a high schooler works a part time job after school and it's their birthday, they will still have the holiday from work, but not from school.

isn't this a great plan? i think so. i felt totally brillz when i thought of it. i think we've got three great new laws that the american people will be thrilled about. except maybe not postal workers because now they'll have to mind a drive-thru as well as normal duties.

eh, they're government workers. maybe i'll give them all a raise. then more people will want to become postal workers, and they can hire specific people to ONLY work the drive-thru. that way there will be sufficient staff coverage at both the walk-in postal window, the mail sorting room, and the drive-thru.

it'll be like a fast food restaurant. there will be people working for JUST the front and JUST the drive-thru. i think it could totally work. and it could be really efficient if it works well.

BUT ONLY mail pick-up. if you have to do ANYTHING other than pick up your mail - go inside.

man, i can't wait until i am president. you should be excited too. i'm also going to do things like

1. abolish the death penalty
2. legalize gay marriage
3. make guns illegal

yep that's right - illegal. do i think people should have the right to own a firearm? no. why does anyone need a gun hanging around in their house? to protect themselves? well, if nobody owned a gun, then nobody would be afraid of having to protect their family from "those gun-crazy neighbors."

people might not support me in that. but, we'll really play up the birthday holiday during the campaign.

i'm also going to support a prison system more like Norway. or, Scandinavia in general. their belief is that, "If you treat people badly, they will behave badly. Anyone can be a citizen if we treat them well, respect them, and give them challenges and demands."

great. now that's we've once again cleared up my presidential campaign.... let's move on.

SO.

i went to bed tuesday morning at 8:30am. set my alarm for 11:45am.

woke up at 12:05pm. i had a new voicemail. it was Diane saying that staff meeting was not going to be at 12:30pm because there was another meeting in the meeting room. she would let me know when we were ready to meet.

all i heard was, "julie, go back to sleep! we're not having staff meeting right now!"

so, i went back to sleep.

and didn't wake up again until 4pm. i saw that Diane had called me again at 1pm, to let me know that staff meeting was happening now. but, i never even woke for that call. the phone was right next to my bed! and i didn't even hear it. and, wow, i slept great!

i woke up at 4pm feeling quite refreshed and happy. spent some time online. then made a pot of coffee and a bowl of oatmeal and sat down with Ruby to watch some Entourage. i have one episode left of season 2.

the end of season 2 is prime Ari Gold material. he's so freaking good. Jeremy Piven. i would marry him if he asked. (fyi, jeremy..)

now, it's 11.16p. i'm getting hungry again for supper. i think i will have my leftover sub from when i visited my dad on monday. that sounds good.

and probs watch some more Entourage.

i didn't get to the post office today. i will go tomorrow. i should have some Netflix!! here's what i'm getting:

1. The Accidental Husband (YEP.)
2. Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
3. Tell Me You Love Me, season 1, disc 1 (Andrew's recommendation)


OH OH OH OH OH!!!!!!!!!!!

guess what i ALSO did today?!?!?!?!?!! omg, you're going to be so proud. I AM so proud. i have completed one of my New Year's resolutions. which one, you ask?

1. wear more red plaid shirts

YEP. that's right friends. i bought a red plaid shirt this afternoon. online. okay, so i technically don't have it yet and i'm putting my faith and trust in the USPS that i do get it. but still. it's out of my hands.

i'm just amazing. 5 january and one resolution checked off. nice. AND, the shirt has a ruffle on it. so yeah. that should be two resolutions:

1. wear more red plaid shirts
2. wear more ruffles

but, i didn't. i'm pretty excited about it. once it arrives, i'll let you know. and i'll post a picture of me WEARING the red plaid shirt. totally hott, right?

i was youtubeing 'crash kings' today and found this amazingly awesome fantastical video that i must share with you.

i re-read my crazy blog entry about Tony from last night and realized that i said one of the reasons i loved him was because he played the clav. and today during my re-read i thought, "i wonder if there are any great videos of him playing." hence my youtube searching.

and i found one. and it rocks. the video is called, "Evolution of Guitar Rock - With No Guitars." because the clav is essentially an electric guitar in the shape of a piano.

or, not just in the shape of a piano. but IT IS a piano. or, a keyboard. it'd be kind of funny to watch someone try and play a huge, rectangular guitar.

but no, it's a guitar that is a piano. and it's called the CLAVINET. NOT what i played in the school band. that was a CLARINET. (ugh. the clarinet.)

ANYWAYS. it's an awesome video. he's got the clavinet on top of his normal keyboard. and Crash Kings play popular rock songs, and you hear the electric guitar, but it looks like he's playing the keyboard. it's very strange. but very beautiful. and you get some great shots of his totally hott tattoo on his left hand. if you don't watch the whole video, just watch like, 30 seconds. just so you can see how cool and crazy it is.

ok. is that all?

i like how each of my entries from my awake overnight began with, "i don't really have anything to tell you" and then i went on blogging for like, two straight hours.

i kind of always manage to tell you things. i don't know if you read them. or if you particularly care. but, i guess that's the point of a blog? to write about yourself.

oh, is that the point? i've only been doing this for five years.

i hope i look good in red plaid. what if i look terrible? will that be considered a failed resolution? or just a bummer resolution? i guess a bummer one. because, i will have completed it.

actually, the resolution clearly states that i want to "wear more red plaid shirts" and not just, "buy a red plaid shirt." so, i guess that would be considered a failed resolution.

step 1. buy red plaid shirt
step 2. wear red plaid shirt often

in order for the resolution to be considered complete, i will need to wear the red plaid shirt frequently. at least once a month. that will be 12 times in 2010.

but then again, it's my resolution. i guess i can change it. or not change it, but alter it to fit my daily lifestyle.

oh, i don't know. i guess there are no resolution police.

ooo that might make a good action movie. RESOLUTION POLICE. No resolution is too small. Opening New Year's Day 2012.

we'll need a great action/comedy during the year that everyone thinks the world will end. don't you agree? i think Resolution Police will star Owen Wilson.

here's how the trailer will go down:

FADE IN:

INT. NANCY'S HOUSE - KITCHEN - DAY

NANCY sits at her kitchen table, staring at the Snickers bar that lies in front of her. She is middle-aged, wearing a flowery printed blouse and yellow cardigan. She is plain, yet recognizable.

NANCY (V.O.)
I know I shouldn't eat this candy bar. I promised myself. I made the resolution. Come on, Nancy, it's New Year's Day and you're already having this debate. There should be no debate. How am I going to last a whole year when I can barely last one day? I knew I couldn't do this; it was a joke to even make a resolution this year. I never keep them -

We hear a loud CRASH from the other room. Nancy quickly looks to see what it was.

INTERCUT - INT. FRONT HALLWAY/KITCHEN

A MAN stands on Nancy's front door, which he has just broken down. He is wearing a SWAT team uniform. He stands with his hands on his hips. Only his eyes move to look in the kitchen.

MAN
Nancy, you gonna eat that Snickers bar?

NANCY
Uh, um, I was thinking about it.

The Man walks into the kitchen, takes the Snickers bar off the table and walks out while saying:

MAN
Not if I have anything to do about it.

As he walks away, we see the words 'Resolution Police' printed in white letters on the back of his uniform.

Nancy sits, puzzled.


END TITLES.

it's really just a teaser. i see Margo Martindale playing Nancy. she's the lady in the "american tourist alone in paris" segment from Paris Je'Taime.

i don't really know if that script format is right. i just kind of winged it from what i remember. i can totally picture Owen Wilson in that role. he's gonna be great.

anyways. NOW that i don't have anything else to talk about... haha. after writing a script for a teaser trailer. i couldn't come up with a name for Owen. so, that's why he's just MAN. (should be HOTT MAN, am i right?!)

but, he'll need a partner, obvi. either an older, wiser partner. or, someone in some sort of minority group. hey, that's how it usually works.

maybe Morgan Freeman. he might fit well with Owen. they could be funny together.

OKAY. ANYWAYS. now it's 12:17am and i still haven't eaten supper. i'm hungry now. a lot.

so. i'd love some teaser trailer feedback, if you don't mind. i sometimes think that i would like to make it my job to direct trailers. like, piece them together. direct? edit? i don't know. make them. i would like to make movie trailers as my job. like Cameron Diaz in The Holiday. i bet it would be a hard job. but fun.

have a wonderful day. a wonderful wednesday. i'll talk to you later!!


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